Amendments

Dear Best Friend,

So many things can change in such short amount of time. One second you might be planning to take your friend to the airport and have yourself be taken to the airport, only to be in a car at 1:30 in the morning headed to another state, the opposite direction of where you are headed. The day I was supposed to travel home I was supposed to fly from Lubbock to Las Vegas to Oakland. Instead I got in a car with my friend and drove to Omaha/Council Bluffs and was finally on a plane to Oakland. Now it's a new year (this post will aim to not be your stereotypical reflection of a year - while being a stereotypical post reflecting on the year that has past) and so much has happened and so many changes have been mad, and amended, to my life - just like the example above.

This past year (really the past 6 months) so much has changed in my life. I hope the changes keep a coming. Now that that's all typed out I wonder how much of that statement is true. While I like change, there are many things dear to me in life that I wouldn't want changed. Yet there are so many things I would change. I guess the tricky part about amendments is that you don't necessarily know their outcome. I could spend hours upon hours trying to strategize the outcomes of changes in my life, but really where would that get me. This leads me to my next topic of choices and control.

How much control do we really have? Better yet how much control do I have. The answerer, a ton, and none at the same time. To an extent I control how I feel, and what I do, but I can't control others - not that I would want to, because really my own life is enough! Also can I really control my emotions - sure - to a point but then nature takes control. In 2012 I want to learn to accept this one step further and just let it happen. On this topic one can go back to expectations and relationships. We control who we enter relationships with and the expectations we set for those relationships. We should all aim to be grateful for what we have, and stop making life complicated (sorry to be preachy) and myself included perhaps I am mostly talking to myself.

Remember - Each of us is willed, each of us is loved, each of us is necessary.